Who Are You in a Relationship?

We all have our unique ways of approaching a relationship. How you hang out with your buddies or girlfriends is going to be altered in a significant way when you’re sitting across from a special someone. But have you ever wondered if this is a good thing – and what advantages or disadvantages is it bringing to the table?

Who are you really in a relationship?

  • Quiet But Mysterious

Whether you’re shy, trying to play hard to get, or are fed-up with the fanfare of courting and instead want something simpler, the fact of the matter is – you’re an anti-flirt. An anti-flirt is characterized by their quiet and passive nature in regards to dating. They don’t believe in constantly texting back and forth, observing ‘date night’ or Valentine’s Day, and they’re definitely not sending saucy pictures. That’d be embarrassing. That’d be silly. That’d be unnecessary. Why overcomplicate things? What are you really supposed to say, anyways?

While this might sound like a bad thing, and it can lead to your significant other wondering if you’re really that into them, you’re in for a surprise. This gives you a mysterious, unattainable air that makes you intriguing to the right kind of person. The key here is “the right kind of person.” You’ll essentially be waiting for your special someone to make the first move.

  • Low-Key But Steady

You know that comfortable silence you reach after a few months of dating? As the low-key relationship type, you bring that to the table day one. You’re laid back and casual about the relationship – and while that doesn’t mean you’re not serious about it, it means you’re not going to be swept up in the Nora Roberts experience. You’re as much of a friend as a significant other, and like to keep your displays of public affection to hand holding or the occasional chaste kiss.

You’re prone to texting them as often as you text friends, you’re not afraid to say you miss them, and nice dinners in are far superior to extravagant shows of affection. While this might come off as boring, on the contrary – it’s valued as steady, reliable, and you’re always there when needed. You won’t have many relationships, but those you do – are meaningful.

  • Adventurous But Hard to Pin Down

Go big or go home. While couples usually are together for years before they worry about keeping the magic alive, you’re dead-set on enjoying all that new and renewed magic now. You’re prone to saucy texts or pictures, last-minute-decision getaways, and elaborate dinners.

Even if you don’t have the bank account for it, you’re looking to keep yourself and your partner on your toes. Whether this is playful banter, pranks, or something more exciting physically, ‘predictable’ isn’t something you support. While this makes you adventurous and fun, it can be exhausting and make it hard for your partner to find a comfortable middle ground.

  • Passionate But Aggressive

You feel – and you feel intensely. When you’re with someone, you’re certain you’re with them for life and aren’t afraid to show how much you care. From public displays of affection to talking about them constantly to saucy pictures and texts just to let them know you’re thinking of them, you don’t want any doubt about your feelings. Why hide it? This makes you confident and thrilling, but can also be overwhelming at points.


If you want a sneak peek at who you’ll be in a relationship – or how you’re expressing yourself now, in overlooked ways – then here’s an easy tip: Your flirting style is the precursor to how you act in a relationship. Are you an aggressive flirt? An anti-flirt? Check out this quiz to find out exactly – and learn how to turn that into your secret weapon!